CampQuake.com: Clan of the Campers

We

the campers, in order to annoy those who whine, formally establish camping, ensure the hatred of our hordes, provide a home for closet campers, promote the art of camping en masse, and secure the blessing of safety in numbers for ourselves and our secret society, do ordain and establish this clan for all campers. December 31, 1996

When

in the course of human events it becomes necessary for one segment of the Quake community to dissolve the political bonds that have connected it to another, and to assume among the powers of the web, the separate but equal station to which the laws of common sense and God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation. We hold these truths to be self evident, that all campers are consumers, that they are endowed by their dollar with certain inalienable rights, that among these are defiance, ambush strategy, and the pursuit of campsites. January 1, 1997

Park Ranger

CampCraft

[CotC History]

CotC was formed by Crappy Pants and Fuzzbutt in response to the odd compulsive fixation some have with camping. They then appointed the Aide-de-Camp to act in their interest and release them from the responsiblity of being chieftans. More directly CotC was started to once and for all place a toe-tag on those players and clans which purport to be superior, talk from both sides of their neck and type before thinking.

The idea for a clan of “campers” united against a common foe was a revelation unleashed upon the Aide-de-Camp in a darkly lighted pub amongst a thousand yelling patrons on December 31, 1996. The next day sites dedicated to camping created by Crappy Pants and Fuzzbutt were united into one site and CotC was born. Hence the January 1, 1997 Decleration of Camping Independence.

CotC believes that all players have at one time or another been accused of camping. Take a break someplace, grab some extra health, or just stop to take a piss and you run the risk of being accused of camping. “Camper!” they say, or “Fuzzbutt is camping, kill the camper!” Like an adolescent toddler whining “Mom, he’s camping.” Reductio ad absurdum. Ambush tactics are valid, ancient, and very practiced by a large majority of the Quake community whether they admit to it or not. But the decisive factor here is that gaming should always be fun. Whiners and the rules nazi spoil this fun by dictating how one should play. CotC rejects this authority and the nasty presentations and demonstrations of arrogance some in our community unleash online. The method to our madness is respect for each gamer, their rights online to clean fun, and our right to camp should we elect to do so.

Camping has become something people just spit out whenever they get an itch to do so, get killed because they were picking their nose instead of playing, or just weren’t paying attention. No longer will players be forced to be a sounding board for people with an arrogant and nasty disposition. Most CotC members are not actual campers, some are, but the founding fathers and larger host of new members are not. Each member is sick of being called “campers” and will no longer tolerate it. Together we “campers” will roam the servers establishing campsites en masse, consistently play as a team and assasinate anyone who would oppose our right not only to camp but to have simple fun.

Thus it is the general consensus of the members of the Clan of the Camper that the only way to deal with whiners is to destroy them. This Clan will actively conduct raids on selected servers when whiners or rule nazi nests are overturned and exposed to the light. Not one camper, not two or three but hordes. Sallying forth to monthly server domination we will, by force of action, bring to the table a new dawn of camping and usher in a new era of respect. No whiner gets out alive! If your tired of whiners or have bled on your own now bleed with the Aide-de-Camp.

If you are a camper, ctf freak, or are looking for a home because you are sick of being called a “camper” complete the enlistment process to join the pride.

[CotC Enlistment]

The Clan Of The Camper enlistment process is complicated by design. The method of our madness is an attempt to weed from our horde the rules nazi’s and whiners which spawned us. Moreover because we are largely a body of friends we choose our members carefully. To date this routine has served us well and if you gain our acceptance then it shall serve you too.

Before we provide a link for you to explore we must cover some basic fundamentals which guide the clan. You have seen the preamble and our decleration of independence but there is much more. If you’re interested in finding out what spawned us read this, otherwise continue:

The first foundation of membership must be participation. This clan is not for lone gunmen or players which only participate when ‘they’ want to. Rather we expect your participation in our antics will be high and that you will keep us informed of what you’re up to. Failure to do so is a strike against you and a path which forces us to disavow you. You will enter the clan and be listed as ‘active.’ You may, at any time, declare you’re status as ‘inactive’ whithout question for a period of three months. If after that time you don’t declare yourself ‘active’ again you are disavowed. Period. We are not going to drill you nightly, force you to goosestep about weekly, but we may have a practice session or two, we may need members to assist in a scrimmage or match, and we may raid a server as a clan. In these antics you must participate or have a reasonable excuse. Excuses which indicate a ‘pattern of ghost behavior’ force us to disavow you. End of story.

Secondly, and most important is the ‘bushido code.’ Loosly translated we will call this a ‘code of ethics.’ We do not whine about lag. We obviously do not whine about camping. We do not engage in cerebral conversations about camping in servers and respond to whiners by typing “Mom he’s camping” or simply “Whiner!” We have no respect for players with a nasty or rude disposition. And insubordination which compromises the integrity of the clan will not be tolerated. Pursuant to this members are to conduct themselves in a fashion respectful of others, fellow members, and the general public. Failure to comply forces us to disavow you. The ‘bushido code’ also dictates that you’re fellow clan members come first before the public. We are you’re ‘blood,’ you’re brothers, essentially we are you’re cyber-family. We are not the ‘borg’ but we will add you’re intellectual distinctiveness to our own. You’re singular mission to place an end to the domination of servers by whiners and rules nazi’s will adapt to service the [CotC] chevron.

[CotC Bushido Code]

Loosly translated we will call the ‘bushido code’ a ‘code of ethics.’ We do not whine about lag. We obviously do not whine about camping. We do not engage in cerebral conversations about camping while in servers and respond to whiners by typing “Mom he’s camping” or simply “Whiner!” We carry no respect for players with a nasty or rude disposition. Insibordination which compromises the integrity of the clan will not be tolerated. And every member of CotC is to play as a team when together. Independantly members may elect to free-for-all but team tactics rule the day…we call this the ‘band of the hand.’

At a glance the CotC Bushido Code:

1. Lag whining is not tolerated.
2. Camping whines are not tolerated.
3. Never argue with whiners.
4. Respect for fellow gamers.
5. Band of the hand.
6. Clan material is private.
7. Belief in an organized chain of command.
8. Belief in the democratic process. Unite The Campers!

Pursuant to this members are to conduct themselves in a fashion respectful of others, fellow members, and the general public. Failure to comply forces us to disavow you. The ‘bushido code’ also dictates that your fellow clan members come first before the public. We are your ‘blood,’ your brothers, essentially we are your cyber-Quake-family.

Of significant importance is the right of every member to contribute to the cause. Belief in the democratic process is keenly supported. While [CotC] members are grouped into ‘Camping Legions,’ and the leadership structure mimics ancient Rome, it is our long lasting vow to place ultimate authority back into the hands of each member. Each member of the clan is considered a ‘Senator’ and as such may contribute if not legislate clan direction, create new internal systems of governance, and work toward complete self rule. The Aide-de-Camp, acting as the clan figurehead, provides a focus and voice while the membership branches provide ‘checks and balances’ preventing the formation of fascist rule and implosion.

Lastly members may not distribute private clan material amongst other clans, newsgroups or via e-mail. They may not distribute their Senate password amongst other legion members nor the general public. Failure to adhere to this policy once again forces use to disavow you.

https://web.archive.org/web/19991103172443/http://www.campquake.com/cotc/enlistment.shtml

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