The Best of Ask Larry the Llama
Welcome! Welcome to the Best of Larry the Llama. In case you don’t know, Larry is our virtual llama, who lives with us here in our dorm. He’s very friendly, and you can ask him questions, as many people do, and he comes up with an appropriate response. Here are the best questions and answers that he’s gotten (and given) so far:
Date: Sat, 4 Nov 1995 00:56:15 -0500
What the fuck is this shit?
Larry’s answer is: sheep, llots of sheep
Date: Sat, 4 Nov 1995 13:07:44 -0500
Does Tom have a penis
Larry’s answer is: 42 of course
Date: Sat, 4 Nov 1995 13:11:38 -0500
How do you feel about interspecies relationships?
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Sun, 5 Nov 1995 16:42:49 -0500
What do you do for fun?
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Tue, 7 Nov 1995 10:34:58 -0500
Larry, are your balls shaved?
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Mon, 20 Nov 1995 21:27:24 -0500
how do you exercise
Larry’s answer is: up, up, down, down, lleft, right, lleft, right, A, B in the
title screen for infinite llives.
Date: Tue, 28 Nov 1995 13:19:10 -0500
do you have a girlfriend, Larry?
Larry’s answer is: 42 of course
Date: Wed, 29 Nov 1995 19:08:50 -0500
what is the meaning of life
Larry’s answer is: 42 of course
Date: Thu, 30 Nov 1995 10:59:34 -0500
What do you like to eat?
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Thu, 30 Nov 1995 13:46:57 -0500
What do you do for fun?
Larry’s answer is: sheep, llots of sheep
Date: Fri, 1 Dec 1995 20:27:59 -0500
how do you drive a woman wild in bed
Larry’s answer is: up, up, down, down, lleft, right, lleft, right, A, B in the
title screen for infinite llives.
ate: Tue, 12 Dec 1995 00:39:03 -0500
Will I ever get better?
Larry’s answer is: not llikely.
Date: Tue, 12 Dec 1995 21:29:00 -0500
Do you have a female llama?
Larry’s answer is: 42 of course
Date: Thu, 14 Dec 1995 16:52:47 -0500
Larry, are you finished in the bathroom?
Larry’s answer is: not llikely.
Date: Sun, 17 Dec 1995 02:28:54 -0500
Where do you prefer to be petted?
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Mon, 18 Dec 1995 14:05:39 -0500
Have you finished your finals?
Larry’s answer is: not llikely.
Date: Mon, 18 Dec 1995 14:34:04 -0500
What’s your favorite food?
Larry’s answer is: sheep, llots of shee
Date: Mon, 18 Dec 1995 18:46:48 -0500
What is Pi?
Larry’s answer is: 3.141592654 or so
Date: Tue, 19 Dec 1995 22:23:16 -0500
Fuck you larry.
Larry’s answer is: If it feels good, do it.
Date: Fri, 2 Feb 1996 11:05:17 -0500
what do llamas eat
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Mon, 5 Feb 1996 14:41:54 -0500
why do you want to kill my parents
Larry’s answer is: If it feels good, do it.
Date: Tue, 6 Feb 1996 08:04:02 -0500
What would you think if I sayd that I love you?
Larry’s answer is: not llikely.
Date: Wed, 7 Feb 1996 22:52:39 -0500
what do you eat
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Fri, 16 Feb 1996 20:51:49 -0500
Will you marry me, Larry?
Larry’s answer is: not llikely.
Date: Fri, 15 Mar 1996 07:07:22 -0500
according to the stars who is going to win the Presidental
race?
Larry’s answer is: sheep, llots of sheep
Date: Fri, 15 Mar 1996 11:29:39 -0500
How can I find inner happiness?
Larry’s answer is: Kill your parents. Kill your parents. Kill your parents.
Date: Fri, 15 Mar 1996 11:38:50 -0500
are you gay
Larry’s answer is: not llikely.
Date: Fri, 15 Mar 1996 13:11:56 -0500
So Larry, if you had a sheep and Ted Turner in front of you,
which would be the least likely to read a magazine during sex?
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Mon, 25 Mar 1996 04:46:46 -0500
Larry who taught you to spit?
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Mon, 25 Mar 1996 13:38:41 -0500
WHAT THE HELL IS SHEEP LOTA OF SHEEP MEAN. I ASKED HOW OLD HE WAS?
Larry’s answer is: 42 of course
Date: Mon, 25 Mar 1996 13:40:19 -0500
you are fucking weird
Larry’s answer is: Go ask your mother.
Date: Mon, 20 Sep 1999 20:56:09 -0500
Larry, I’m a lesbian and yet I’m desperately in love with George. I love making accidental contact with him. I find him sexy. But all I really want from him is more free raspberry hard cider. Can you help me? I can’t ask my mother.
Larry’s answer is: Sheep, llots of sheep.
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