wormfood for thought

5/18/99

Issue 0: WTF is wft?

Before posting the inaugural edition of my weekly editorial wft (coming next week), I think an explanation is in order. I suspect you may be wondering “Who or what the hell is wormfood, and what qualifies him (it?) to publicly spout opinions?” Ill attempt to answer both questions as honestly as possible. My name in RealLifeä is Anthony Logan Miller, commonly abbreviated as Tony. I am a thirty something professional dilettante who currently works as a Network Communication Analyst (not to be confused with analist) in Springfield, Missouri. Like most of you I cut my online-FPS teeth on Doom and Quake, where I had a series of pseudonyms: player (hey, it took me a while to figure it out how to change it), Logan (my middle name, I dropped this nick when I turned 30), Latency du Lag (Le Morte d’Arthur reference combined with despair over my modem), and briefly – Worms Meat (taken from Romeo and Juliet, and referring to my normal horizontal corpse view). Unfortunately, most Quakers failed to “get” the name Worms Meat and offered a constant barrage of tiny penis jokes. To avoid this, I modified my nick to wormfood. Now the jokes are mostly excremental.

As for what qualifies me to “publish” my opinions on anything, heres my glib retort – If opinions are like assholes, then the Internet is a worldwide toilet cam. Basically, I have an abundance of opinions on a wide range of subjects, and now I have the opportunity to express them. Sporbly felt that giving me a dedicated forum on the Nostromo site might reduce the number of rambling sermons I frequently post to his Arena message board. Confining me to a separate page permits visitors to read entire threads of “youre a camping fag > I am not > R2 > am not > get a life > infinity“, without having to wade through my long-winded, pontificating posts. It also allows Sporbers to serve the minority community of linguistic masochists who need a weekly dose of multi-syllabic English butchery, vague references, John Dvorak style bolding of phrases for no apparent reason, and sentences that dont know when to stop. Ed. Note: enough with the bolding already!

Seriously speaking for a moment, I thank The Sporbinator for the opportunity (and Ed Hunter for the offer). Over the next few weeks I hope to address topics of interest to the average Nostromotic – mostly gaming related. Dont be surprised, however, if I talk about some general interest issues or my own pet peeves. No matter what the topic or your opinion on it, I encourage you to share your thoughts in the message boards. If we get enough response, perhaps Sporboramavich can even set up a separate, general topic forum for us to abuse. I would also appreciate any suggestions you might have for future issues (topics of contention, pet peeves, observations, etc.). You can reach me at logan@dialnet.net, or post to the Arena forum.

If youve managed to stick with me this far, then please return for next weeks wftä – Issue 1: Why Quake is like Kung Fu.

Thx,

wormfood

https://web.archive.org/web/20000128164711/http://www.sporbly.com:80/nostromo/wormfood/wft.htm